Hanukkah Thoughts

Happy Hanukkah, everyone! The holiday came by early this year, and I'm... well, not so ashamed to say that I forgot about it completely. It's not like it's a very important holiday, even for Jews (you can bet your car that I'm keeping Passover, though). And even important holidays I'm used to, like Thanksgiving, have passed by quite a bit differently in this country. Even Thanksgiving, one of my favorite holidays, was postponed, and when I did celebrate it, it wasn't the family affair I remembered it being back in the States.

The important holidays here are the Bayrams, some religious and some otherwise. While I didn't do any of the religious sacrifices associated with Kurban Bayram, I celebrated the hell out of it, and I did commemorate Istanbul's Independence on an October Wednesday - by going out for dinner and a drink with my coworkers.

If I were a different person, I would bring my traditions to the foreign country I live in and introduce them to my friends, throw a Hanukkah party here in the apartment and spin dreidels for chocolates and teach myself how to make potato latkes (I've heard they're not hard). I still might do these things, but I personally find it difficult to celebrate a holiday in solitude. I won't remember it on my own; holidays exist for family. And when everyone around me sees the unimportance of it all, it's harder and harder for me to contradict them. I'm a horrible Jew, even though I'm a good nomad.

And this goes against all the discomfort I personally feel about the "organized" part of organized religion. How come I need people around me to feel the power of a holiday but feel slightly nauseous whenever I step into a service? I mean, I can answer both these questions, but that's a little contradictory, don't you think?

Does this mean I'm feeling alone out here?

Hm.

Perhaps.

I'm going to start organizing that Hanukkah party now.